Woke up a little groggy this morning but was excited because I get to leave the house today for a small excursion. It’s my brother-in-laws birthday so my wife made a fun little sign to put on his lawn so that neighbours will honk. He will surely hate that, but my wife loves making signs so as long as she is happy I will encourage it.
On the drive there Marie mentions that she had called a pediatrician’s office to see if they were taking new patients as we have a baby on the way. The receptionist was rude and not very helpful. I said that was to be expected because pediatricians have very little patience. She asks “why is that?” I pretend not to hear and say “What?”. She asks “Why do pediatricians have very little patience?”. I grin a cheeky grin and she rolls her eyes and my strike one of awful puns permitted per day is already on the board.
We arrive at her brothers’ house to drop off his present and to retrieve the sign that her mother sneakily placed on the lawn earlier that morning. The carboard can be thrown out but she needs the stakes to make a new sign for her sister-in-laws upcoming birthday. Marie places the stakes on the floor of the car and sanitizes her hands after touching them. I mention that there was unlikely to be in any risk of contamination because the stakes are low. I grin widely and accept my strike 2.
On the drive there Marie mentions that she had called a pediatrician’s office to see if they were taking new patients as we have a baby on the way. The receptionist was rude and not very helpful. I said that was to be expected because pediatricians have very little patience. She asks “why is that?” I pretend not to hear and say “What?”. She asks “Why do pediatricians have very little patience?”. I grin a cheeky grin and she rolls her eyes and my strike one of awful puns permitted per day is already on the board.
We arrive at her brothers’ house to drop off his present and to retrieve the sign that her mother sneakily placed on the lawn earlier that morning. The carboard can be thrown out but she needs the stakes to make a new sign for her sister-in-laws upcoming birthday. Marie places the stakes on the floor of the car and sanitizes her hands after touching them. I mention that there was unlikely to be in any risk of contamination because the stakes are low. I grin widely and accept my strike 2.
We return home and I decide to make a whipped coffee to remedy my grogginess. It is extremely delicious but now Marie is concerned as apparently, I become excessively annoyingly punny under the influence of caffeine. As I spoon out the instant coffee I ask if that would be ‘grounds for divorce’? She pretends to not find it funny but I know deep down she thinks I’m hilarious.
I have a Zoom meeting scheduled for 11am to discuss an upcoming Niagara concert series that I will be MC’ing. My camera keeps freezing up due to bandwidth issues because Marie is currently on her treadmill and streaming one of her shows. Pretty Little Gossipers I think it’s called. I ask if she wouldn't mind pausing it for a few minutes so I can finish the meeting and she agrees so long as I promise to stop with the annoying puns. I reluctantly agree, but little does she know that two of my fingers are overlapping each other in a crossing motion which renders the agreement null and void.
After the meeting is over I come upstairs and am informed that Marie has her own scheduled staff meeting online shortly so could I please refrain from using the internet, which is great news because I really don’t want to watch Pretty Little Gossipers.
I have a Zoom meeting scheduled for 11am to discuss an upcoming Niagara concert series that I will be MC’ing. My camera keeps freezing up due to bandwidth issues because Marie is currently on her treadmill and streaming one of her shows. Pretty Little Gossipers I think it’s called. I ask if she wouldn't mind pausing it for a few minutes so I can finish the meeting and she agrees so long as I promise to stop with the annoying puns. I reluctantly agree, but little does she know that two of my fingers are overlapping each other in a crossing motion which renders the agreement null and void.
After the meeting is over I come upstairs and am informed that Marie has her own scheduled staff meeting online shortly so could I please refrain from using the internet, which is great news because I really don’t want to watch Pretty Little Gossipers.
I decide I will try to be productive and attempt to assemble the new dresser for the babys room. The dresser was manufactured on Cottontail Lane which I thought was hilarious and I wonder if there is anyone named Peter who lives there. One can only hop.
The dresser assemblage turns out to be much easier than I had anticipated. This made me very happy. The hardest part was tearing up the box to fit into garbage bags. I was also very happy with the fact that I now had tons of Styrofoam blocks to make a cool fort. Marie thinks this is a bad idea as the Styrofoam will break apart and make a huge mess.
My fort building was a huge disaster and now there are tiny staticky Styrofoam pieces everywhere and the basement is a huge mess. I don’t want to vacuum as the noise will attract Marie and I don’t want her to know that she was right. So I sweep it all up with a broom and dustpan but my hands are all shaky from too much caffeine and I keep spilling more on the floor.
Once the mess is tidied I come back upstairs to see what Marie is doing. She is crafting with her Cricut machine and making towels with funny sayings written on them. It makes me very sad that the towels are funnier than I am, but at least I can use the towels to soak up my tears.
The dresser assemblage turns out to be much easier than I had anticipated. This made me very happy. The hardest part was tearing up the box to fit into garbage bags. I was also very happy with the fact that I now had tons of Styrofoam blocks to make a cool fort. Marie thinks this is a bad idea as the Styrofoam will break apart and make a huge mess.
My fort building was a huge disaster and now there are tiny staticky Styrofoam pieces everywhere and the basement is a huge mess. I don’t want to vacuum as the noise will attract Marie and I don’t want her to know that she was right. So I sweep it all up with a broom and dustpan but my hands are all shaky from too much caffeine and I keep spilling more on the floor.
Once the mess is tidied I come back upstairs to see what Marie is doing. She is crafting with her Cricut machine and making towels with funny sayings written on them. It makes me very sad that the towels are funnier than I am, but at least I can use the towels to soak up my tears.
I use the sadness as motivation to write some new material for my newest ‘Live on Quarantine’ episode. I watched the movie ‘Se7en’ a few days ago and thought it would be funny to hold a box and yell ‘What’s in the box?! What’s in the box??!’ before opening it and pulling out a number ‘7’. I ask Marie if she can make me a ‘7’ with her Cricut and she agrees without even asking what it is for because she already knows the answer will cause more eye rolling and her retinas are overworked as it is.
Once I have my ‘7’ I am excited to film my new segment but am soon disappointed when I realize that I don’t have a box. My sadness amplifies when I realize that I have just finished destroying a perfectly good box an hour earlier. I now truly understand Brad Pitts despair. The towels grow soggy and heavy from my tears.
I decide to focus on a different project and work on editing our latest episode of Check Mates, the new chess themed podcast that I host with Sab Powers. We were filming late last night with guests Rihan Rahsi and Chris Boboros until 1:30am and that’s probably why I was so tired this morning. I should have gone to bed afterwards but ended up playing 5 extra games with random people online. I beat a kid from India but lost to players from Spain, Ukraine and Bangladesh. The last game was against a guy from the Czech Republic and I sent him a message in chat saying that we were ‘Czech Mates'! He immediately resigned and logged out. Every win counts! 😊
Once I have my ‘7’ I am excited to film my new segment but am soon disappointed when I realize that I don’t have a box. My sadness amplifies when I realize that I have just finished destroying a perfectly good box an hour earlier. I now truly understand Brad Pitts despair. The towels grow soggy and heavy from my tears.
I decide to focus on a different project and work on editing our latest episode of Check Mates, the new chess themed podcast that I host with Sab Powers. We were filming late last night with guests Rihan Rahsi and Chris Boboros until 1:30am and that’s probably why I was so tired this morning. I should have gone to bed afterwards but ended up playing 5 extra games with random people online. I beat a kid from India but lost to players from Spain, Ukraine and Bangladesh. The last game was against a guy from the Czech Republic and I sent him a message in chat saying that we were ‘Czech Mates'! He immediately resigned and logged out. Every win counts! 😊
